Liking Who We Are

Yesterday, Grace walked into the kitchen and said, "J.J., you're so cool and handsome. I love you." J.J. responded with, "Yeah, I'm cool, but I'm not handsome." I'm not quite sure if that's because he didn't fully understand what handsome means (I'm not sure Grace does, either, but she knew is was something good) or because he doesn't like his looks. He's not usually shy about his feelings about himself or anyone else - he is usually very positive. When I asked him about this he said, "Well, I'm more battle-ish type." I'm not a prince guy; I'm an army commander." OK, I think that explains it.

Along those same lines, Katherine and I watched "stagedoor", a documentary about a primo acting camp in NY called Stagedoor Manor. She was watching one of the kids audition and said, "wow, he's really nervous, huh?" Then I told her that he actually played the role of Simba on Broadway's Lion King and she said, "Really...really?!?! He was on Broadway and on TV and he's that nervous at auditions? Wow, I like myself." She realized how good she really is (at singing/dancing) and how well she handled the auditions last weekend. She really related to one of the girls who got picked on in school for being "different."

Her mom lamented that she wanted her daughter to just be like everyone else. Not me. No way. I'm am thrilled to death with Katherine's individuality and strong sense of self. Just hearing her say that she likes herself was one of my proudest moments as a parent. If we accomplished nothing else in the year and a half we homeschooled her, then it was worth it just for that. Still to this day, I worry about all the shaming messages I have and sometimes still do send her. Do I worry about her being conceited or full of herself? No way - she is full of insecurities and humility and love and selfishness just like everyone else, but she is pretty aware of others and their feelings and value.